Assertiveness Skills

An honest, direct and appropriate expression of one’s feelings, thoughts and beliefs. Assertiveness is the ability to communicate your needs, feelings, opinions, and beliefs in an open and honest manner without violating the rights of others. A person can choose to be assertive by his own will. However, being assertive involves a definite set of characteristics and behaviors to exercise one’s assertiveness. Being assertive involves:

Saying ‘yes’ when you want to, and saying ‘no’ when you mean ‘no’

Not agreeing to do something just to please someone else

Deciding on, and sticking to, clear boundaries

•Assertiveness Training or ‘AT’ was introduced by Andrew Salter in the year 1961 and popularized by Joseph Wolpe. Wolpe believed that a person could not be both assertive and anxious at the same time.

•So, when a person becomes assertive, he would not suffer from unnecessary anxiety.

People who are ‘passive’ are the ‘Nice Guys’. These ‘Nice Guys’ appear generous, flexible, and extremely polite. However, underneath the surface they are helpless, anxious and have a resentful core. So, you should stop being a forever ‘nice guy’ to avoid all your pent-up resentment from being pushed around to come out in an unexpected outburst of anger and violence.

Positive affirmations play an important role in developing self-confidence and becoming assertive. Only when you are confident about yourself can you become an assertive person. It is crucial that you use powerful affirmations daily and affirm to yourself of the good things that you have to offer as a person to this world.

There are various positive affirmations that you can use at your workplace to improve yourself as a professional and develop better relationships at the workplace. Some of these affirmations may appeal to you, others may not. It is important that you develop a set for yourself that best suits your personal characteristics and behavior.